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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26969695">It was that straight-forward</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuzzingAerin626/pseuds/BuzzingAerin626'>BuzzingAerin626</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Break Up, Hurt, M/M, One Shot, Post-Break Up, also obligatory daisuga namedrop, but it doesnt end bad i dont think, but its not like fun, but not enough to tag em, idk if you can count it as comfort?, idk if you can count it as happy ending?, im just weak, mostly a bummer time lol, theres sex</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 20:42:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,884</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26969695</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuzzingAerin626/pseuds/BuzzingAerin626</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Asahi and Noya broke up a while ago, and it's sad. So they talk, cause they're sad.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>It was that straight-forward</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">


        <li>
            Inspired by

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26767738">My Side of Paradise</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmisce/pseuds/cosmisce">cosmisce</a>.
        </li>

    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was definitely inspired by the relationship dynamic in this fic by cosmice, altho beyond inspiration this is a stand alone piece. Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Asahi found him in the park</p><p>The message inviting him to talk made his heart speed up; he hadn’t felt able to fill his lungs to capacity for hours.</p><p>He thought this was over. He thought that the heaviness of this thing was gone. He loved Yuu, but when it was over, it was like he could breathe again. He could sleep. It was selfish, but he could finally think about himself for once without feeling guilty. The stress, the pressure was gone.</p><p>And now he was here, on his way back to that place, on his way back to that ever-present, never-wavering source of exhaustion. Not that that’s how he saw it, exactly. He just knew he already felt tired.</p><p>He got out of his car, and found Nishinoya on a bench, waiting for him anxiously. It was the first time they’d seen each other since the breakup. Asahi had ignored Noya’s calls and messages. He had avoided at all costs crossing paths with him at social occasions. But this time Noya had left a voice message on the answering machine that was different than the ones left immediately after they had ended things.</p><p>“Asahi, I need you to come meet with me. I’ll text you the location. I just need to talk, and then I’m out of your hair for good, I promise.”</p><p>A text had indeed followed it, showing a small park on a map.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Asahi approached Nishi, who invited him to take a seat, visibly relieved that Asahi actually showed up.</p><p>“So, uhhh, how’ve you been?” Asahi asked, trying to make conversation even though he didn’t know what kind of conversation they were supposed to be having.</p><p>Noya smiled a bit at Asahi’s attempt, but looked down from Asahi’s gaze, trying to say what he had been planning to. “Asahi, you don’t have to...” he started.</p><p>“Why am I here, Yuu?” Asahi asked bluntly. “Why did you leave me a cryptic-ass message to meet you in a random-ass park after dark?”</p><p>“I wanted to talk to you. You never answered my calls...”</p><p>“We broke up, Yuu”</p><p>“And that means I can’t talk to you??”</p><p>“I was trying to move on. I didn’t want to be dragged into some ploy to get us back together but here I am, always the fool I guess”</p><p>“I don’t want to date again. I just... You meant so much to me Asahi! This,” he gestured angrily to the space between the two them, a space he thought was too wide, “this meant so much to me! And now you expect me to let that go? Forget it ever happened? Fuck Asahi, I thought it meant something to you too. But you get to just ignore my calls, ignore my pleas, you get to just ignore my whole existence from your life??”</p><p>“Yuu, I never forgot about you... I would never forget about you. But I just... I can’t do this Yuu. I can’t do the 3a.m. phone calls, the constant movement and change, the never fucking sitting still. I don’t want you to feel bad about how you need to live your life, but I just can’t keep up with it anymore. I need stability. I need constancy, and routine, and yes, even just boredom from time to time.” He stopped to breathe. He stopped to collect his thoughts. He really wanted it to just stop, period.</p><p>They just didn’t fit. It was that straight-forward.</p><p>“But...” Nishinoya started slowly, after a long moment of silence, “I miss you.”</p><p>“Yuu, please don’t....”</p><p>“What am I supposed to do Asahi???” His voice was louder now, despite it being clearly choked back with tears. “What am I supposed to do to stop missing you? What am I supposed to do when I go to bed alone, when I wake up alone, when I get home to an empty apartment, eat my meals at an empty table, have no one to talk to about my day, or good news, or shitty news, or just to tell them goodnight. Asahi,” tears were trailing down his cheeks, his voice lowered once again, “Asahi I’m so lonely.”</p><p>His last three words were barely more than a whisper. Asahi took a step closer. He couldn’t not. He knew Yuu could use his vulnerability to trap him into something he’d regret, but he couldn’t just leave him there. He didn’t make a move to touch him, but they were barely a few inches apart now. Yuu looked up at his ex, and it took everything in Asahi’s power not to look away.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Often, rain comes in slowly. You walk down the street, it’s cloudy, and you notice a drop or two hit your skin. And then a few more, and you know what’s coming, and you have maybe a few minutes to figure out how to best get to shelter before it gets you soaking wet. But sometimes, it comes in suddenly. You’re outside, you hear a rumble of thunder, and out of seemingly nowhere you’re caught in an enormous downpour.</p><p>That was what happened this time.</p><p>The two were not looking at each other for long when the thunder clapped. They had not heard the thunder for more than a few seconds when they were very suddenly drenched. Asahi took Noya’s hand and the two were running for Asahi’s car. The road it was parked on wasn’t far from the bench where they had been talking, luckily.</p><p>Once inside, they took a second to catch their breath. Asahi turned on the engine to at least get them warmed up. He looked at Nishinoya, and before the other could return his gaze, he turned away. “I need to get you home,” he said flatly. It wasn’t bitter or sad, it was mostly tired.</p><p>He saw Noya nod slowly out of the corner of his eye. He still knew where the other lived and drove them there, neither speaking a word the entire ride.</p><p>When he parked outside the building, Noya moved his body to face Asahi, the movement catching Asahi’s eye.</p><p>“Come up for tea.” It wasn’t a question, not even an offer. It was a plea. One final plea.</p><p>“Yuu I can’t...” Asahi started. His eyes were warm, but sad. Yuu cut him off, begging</p><p>“Asahi please. It’s just tea I promise. I feel bad getting you caught in the rain, at least let me get you a towel and something warm to drink. Then you can leave but please, Asahi let me offer you this.”</p><p>Asahi closed his eyes and took a deep breath before nodding and turning to get out of his car. Yuu followed suit and the two ran the short distance from the parking lot to the front door.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Asahi had never actually been inside the apartment before. Noya moved in after their breakup, and he had never dared go inside. He only knew where it was from having to pick up a very drunk Daichi and Suga after they forgot to pick a designated driver one evening.  </p><p>The apartment was small, which made sense given that Nishi lived alone. It was also rather clean, which was quite remarkable given that, again, Nishi lived here alone. He had never been this tidy when they lived together. It made Asahi uneasy, like the person standing next to him had somehow drastically changed, even though it was truly a nothing detail.</p><p>Yuu was quick to remove his shoes, head down the hall and back, and hand a towel to Asahi who had barely finished taking off his own shoes. He took the towel and started drying himself and his clothes awkwardly. He knew he’d still be damp, but it wasn’t like Noya would have any clothes to offer that would fit him.</p><p>Noya led him to the couch in the small living room that was essentially the same room as the kitchen, and then went to the stove to put on some water. Asahi wrapped himself in the towel for warmth, watching Noya absent-mindedly. Noya opted to stay facing the kettle until the water was boiling, rather than turn to make small talk. Small talk didn’t exactly seem appropriate at the moment.</p><p>When the water was finally boiling, he poured it into the pot, and brought it and two cups over on a tray, setting it down on the old coffee table he had gotten from the street curb the day he moved in. He sat down on the couch next to Asahi. He was happy to do so, and happier to be able to blame his lack of any other chairs in the room for this choice. He eventually poured the tea after it had steeped long enough, and they both warmed themselves with the hot beverage.</p><p>There was more silence.</p><p>Asahi didn’t know what to say, and despite being the one to invite him in, neither did Noya. After long minutes went by, Noya finally said the only thing that came to mind.</p><p>“I’m sorry”</p><p>When he didn’t continue, Asahi turned towards him. Noya stared at his tea.</p><p>“For what?” Asahi prompted.</p><p>“For inviting you up. For asking you to meet me at the park. For being so unstable and not giving you what you need. For falling in love with you. For asking you out on a date at your graduation—”</p><p>“Hey,” Asahi cut him off. “Yuu...” At the sound of his name, Noya finally looked up from his cup to meet Asahi’s eyes. “Please never apologize for that. I know this didn’t work out. I know things aren’t where we planned for them to be, but please please please,” he leaned in closed and held his hand to Noya’s cheek. “Please never feel the need to apologize for this relationship happening. You changed my life, Yuu, and I say that with the greatest amount of love and affection I can. I would never regret it, and I truly hope you don’t either.” His eyes were welling up slightly as he talked, and although Nishinoya was averting his gaze, he could see that he was tearing up as well.</p><p>“I really did love you, Yuu. All those times I told you how deeply in love with you I was, they were all true.”</p><p>“Asahi...” Noya’s voice was small</p><p>“You meant everything to me. I loved you so much. And I still do.”</p><p>“Asahi please...” He was sounding more desperate this time. “Asahi, I appreciate you saying this but I can’t take it. I... I...” And then Noya knew he could either kiss Asahi or burst into tears, so he opted for the first option.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It was so familiar to Asahi. The feeling of his lips, the hunger with which he was pulled in deeper, the way his boyfriend’s smaller body fit into his arms when he wrapped him in them. He pulled back, <em>He isn’t my boyfriend anymore. </em></p><p>But Yuu’s eyes were so full. Full of tears, of raw emotion, and mostly of hurt.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he barely managed to squeak out</p><p>“If... if this happens tonight this can’t mean we’re back together. We both know that won’t work. Right?” Asahi asked softly.</p><p>“No... No it doesn’t work... We don’t work...” Noya answered.</p><p>Asahi put his hand back on Noya’s cheek, like it was a magnet drawn to it with by force of nature.</p><p>“Then this would be a really bad idea, right?” He asked, his thumb brushing under Noya’s eye.</p><p>“It would not be smart” Noya said, pressing his face into the palm.</p><p>“Okay, great,” Asahi finally said, before leaning back down to kiss Nishinoya again. “Amazing,” is all that was said in return.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>If a simple kiss was familiar, the rest was a well loved and memorized song. Noya straddled Asahi’s lap, which allowed Asahi to lift him easily. He carried him, following Noya’s non-verbal directions, into the bedroom. Noya reached behind Asahi’s head to turn on the light, and got dropped on the bed. In the moment their lips parted as they adjusted themselves on the mattress, they looked at each other with a shared worry. “This is a really bad idea,” said one. “I know,” said the other. But they didn’t stop. Their shirts were removed, and they didn’t stop. Asahi’s breath staggered as his hands traced the torso of the man he knew by heart. It was painful in its familiarity. The comfort of this body that he had been so long without, that he may never have again. It broke his heart a thousand times over, and his kisses and wandering hands were hungrily searching for a remedy to this pain, a remedy that did not exist. His mouth moved off of Nishinoya’s and instinctively found the exact spot in his neck that was one of Noya’s true weaknesses. The soft moan that escaped Noya’s lips was breathier than it usually was, and Asahi looked up to see the same painful hunger in his partner’s eyes that he felt though to the very pit of his stomach.</p><p>But, still, they didn’t stop. Their pants came off, but they didn’t stop. They both reached down to touch each other over their underwear, which was promptly removed and tossed aside. As they mutually felt each other up and down their lengths, Noya pulled away with a desperate look in his eye.</p><p>“Asahi, just tonight, can you... please... Just one more time,” he asked softly, yet pleadingly.</p><p>“Y-yeah, alright...” Asahi answered, his heart feeling completely wrenched by the mere sound of Noya’s voice.</p><p>Noya grabbed the lube from drawer of his nightstand, and tossed it to Asahi. Neither had seen anyone since the breakup, which made their lack of condoms less troublesome. They didn’t stop.</p><p>Asahi went in with one finger, slowly, and then two. He continued kissing him all the while. It was, again, all too achingly familiar. A choreography they both knew deep within their muscle memory. Asahi looking out for any telltale signs of discomfort he had learned to distinguish from Noya over the years, Noya knowing exactly what was coming and how to best acclimate to it. Some preparation later, Asahi removed his fingers.</p><p>“Are you sure about this?” Asahi asked</p><p>“It’s not a good idea,” Noya replied with a sad grin. But he nodded to Asahi that he was ready, that he wanted to do this, and Asahi nodded in turn. They still did not stop.</p><p>Asahi placed Noya to face him, but the other refused. He wanted Asahi so bad, but he knew he couldn’t face him this final time. He got out of Asahi’s grasp to place himself on his hands and knees instead. Asahi let him, although he was disappointed. He entered his partner, and until the very end, he was all too aware of the finality of it. Until the very end, until they were both satisfied to completion, they did not stop.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Asahi landed next to where Noya was lying down flat on his stomach. They caught their breaths, saying nothing. After a long few minutes, Asahi quietly put his arm on Nishinoya’s shoulder to encourage him to turn onto his side. Following this guidance, Noya rotated, his back towards the man he had just had inside him. Asahi let his arm wrap around Noya’s waist, and pulled him close. They both lay there a while, their breaths ragged and shallow.</p><p>When Asahi finally spoke, it was simple.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Yuu.”</p><p>“Hey, I invited you in here,” Noya answered, trying to lighten the mood at least a little. It did get a small chuckle out of Asahi.</p><p>“I missed you so much. Everything you were saying about loneliness Yuu, every word was like you were reading my mind. I hadn’t let myself feel it, live it, but it was all true.”</p><p>“Then why are we doing this to ourselves Asahi?” Noya turned to face him, finally. “Why don’t we let ourselves have this joy? What’s stopping us? Why don’t you come back here tomorrow after work, and I’ll have supper ready when you get in and you can tell me about your day and I’ll tell you about mine and then we can watch TV and go to bed together and we don’t have to be so fucking alone Asahi!” He was crying, so angry that there was a simple solution to all this pain.</p><p>But he knew it wasn’t that simple.</p><p>“Yuu...” Asahi started quietly, slowly. “We weren’t happy. You weren’t happy. You were restless, you hated the monotony of living a settled life. What you just described, Yuu, would make you absolutely miserable.”</p><p>There was silence again. Their breathing was calmer now, and through the steadiness you could hear the gentle pitter-patter of the rain outside. It wasn’t as violent anymore, but it was definitely still there.</p><p>“Can you at least stay tonight? I’ll put your clothes in the dryer, just, please, one more night is all I ask”</p><p>“Yeah, I think I’d like that”</p><p>“Is there a way to fix this Asahi? I know dating won’t work, but,” he looked up at Asahi, who was still holding him, “I miss you.”</p><p>“I don’t know how we can...” Asahi started. He looked Noya in his pleading eyes, and he finished, “but I think... I think I’d like us to try.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading! This is my first fic, comments and feedback welcome &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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